Cricket!Cricket!!Cricket!!!......if you don’t like it don’t read it....mind it :-)

I  originally thought of writing something damn serious this time because my previous funny adventures’ articles gave severe stomach ache to many of the avid readers!!..


So , then i decided to open up my latop screen,go to Microsoft word and start typing about cricket. Friends its world cup time and my nonsense fixtures would only add frolicity to it.Hence,when i was thinking of cricket and seriousness , the first name to popup in my mind was that of S.Sreeshanth.(who,interestingly, is the only human on planet earth to be named exactly opposite of his nature).


Thesedays i read blogs ,articles and newspapers regarding the grandplans and strategies which each of the participating teams are making, the poojas & yagya which fans perform,and extra cuttings the cricket “stars” give at the media conference...i laugh..i giggle...i get headache..i cough...i drink bendryl...then i dooze off!!
Reason..because they all forget onething “that in the end its just a ‘game’”.


Thus below are some of the important news/articles regarding CRICKET WORLDCUP....which i felt like sharing with you.






1. Country : INDIA


Newsapaper: The crindu


Article: Tendulkar fans plan Egypt and Libya like protests if umpires give a wrong decision!!


Mumbai,21st feb: Inspired with what ordinary folks can achieve if they stick together for a common cause, fans of Sachin Tendulkar have decided to speak out against those dictatorial umpires, who rule the little master out showing utter disregard for popular sentiments and beliefs during the last format of the worldcup. Tendulkar fans have already started collaborating on social networking websites and are all set to break into Egypt like protests the moment an umpire rules Sachin out.


“We have been tolerating this tyranny for 22 long years since Tendulkar made his international debut,” 24-year-old samanth said, comparing the tyrannous regime of Anti-Tendulkar umpires with that of Hosni Mubarak, who has been ruling Egypt for 29 years.


“Enough is enough!” declared kiran from united states via skype, wearing a coca-cola black T-shirt with “change the game or my name” written over it.


As per the planned events, the moment Sachin is given out “wrongly”, fans would start assembling on a designated “Tendulkar Square” in the city of mumbai, preferably on the marathi ground as well as just outside the other local football stadiums(who cares ..football or cricket...ground is ground!!), and refuse to disperse unless the umpires overturn their decision.


“We are going to make hashtags like #JusticeForgod and # godisneverout trend globally on Twitter, while millions would join our protests on Facebook,” informed abhishek from bhubaneswar, “We are already using Google maps ,google earth and Wikimapia to mark places in and around the stadiums as Tendulkar Squares.”






2. Country : Bangladesh


Newspaper : Ami bangla mach


Article: if Indians dedicate this world cup to sachin, then we dedicate this world cup to ganguly!!


Dhaka,22nd feb: In a dramatic development a day ahead of the India-Bangladesh match in the ICC Cricket
World Cup 2011, Bangladesh has declared that it wanted to win the cup for the former Indian captain Sourav Ganguly.


With Ganguly not being even a Bangladeshi refugee or an immigrant, the move is being termed as a cunning “mind game” against big mighty teams like Australia and england.


Of course if we win it for our country by default, but we want to present this cup to Dada as our gift and as a tribute to his excellence,” Shakib clarified and claimed that the team had blessings from the Bangladesh Cricket Board as well as from the government.


“Yes, we want to win it for Dada,” Shakib Al Hasan, the captain of Bangladesh declared this morning in a hurriedly called press conference, which also had “korbo lorbo jeetbo re” written on a canvas in the backdrop.


Interestingly sharukh khan was also present at the press conference not only to support this cause but also promote his new upcoming film Ra.one......”from last two years, money is going out but nothing is coming ...so i thought of cost-control measures and convinced Bangladeshis for a joint press statement”....sharukh khan told winking his wrinkled eyes...


{”i think already dada and eden garden are both out...now its time for buddhadeb bhatterjee to go”....whispered shahrukh in the ears of smiling mamta didi.,who had just come in passenger train to Dhaka to show off her austerity drive and to cheer bangla team.....our source confirmed us}






3.Country : Pakistan


Newspaper : Pakistan-e-barbad


Article : Pakistan players ask for life imprisonment in Andaman nicobar islands if allowed more match fixing


Islamabad,23rd feb: forseeing the difficult times going in Pakistan, the Pakistan cricket team along with the now suspended trio has asked the PCB-pakistan cricket board to to fix a few more matches, especially in the coming World Cup to make more pocket money.


“Let them make some money....they too have family and childrens to feed “ shouted Veena Malik, the ex-girlfriend of mohd.asif .Even the suspended young bolwer Amir said, “But they should allow us to play in the coming world cup and throw some more no-balls and wides after consulting the bookies.”


The trio along with veena malik and sania mirza argued that this would be a “win-win” situation for all the parties – ICC, cricketers, and bookies.


According to sources, PCB, which earlier didn’t show any interest in helping the players, has now expressed interest in “partnering” with the cricketers in their latest “initiative”. “


Yes, we got a call from a board member earlier today where he offered us to help and secure a better ‘deal’ with the ICC,” Salman Butt confirmed, “But we have not taken a call yet. In fact, we may not need them at all as ICC president Sharad Pawar has already replied to our mails and sought details of our offer.
In the mean time, the PCB is seeking special advice from Suresh kalmadi and A.Raja on this matter.






4.Country: Srilanka


Newspaper: lengthy timepass tensionless entertainment paper (LTTE newspaper)


Article : Srilanka is going to rest entire team against liliputs Newzealand


Colombo,24th feb: In action packed thriller interview with the newsapaper,the veteran of the srilankan cricket team MP.jayasuriya announced that the entire team is being rested in the not-do-happening match against minnows new-zealand .


“look i am a member of parliament , down here in srilanka...i have hundreds of other works to do. Its completelty waste and time-boring to play against new-zealand...as they cant even win against my sons’ cricket team....its other issue that he is only 4 years and my bat weighs more than him.”


“We have lots of important cricket coming up. There is the Kai Altech Premier T20 league and ACC matches against Malaysia , Kenya and Afghanistan. Given the amount of cricket the boys have been playing, we want to protect them from injury and keep them fresh for these important engagements,” replied srilankan captain .


“still trying to convince srilankan cricket board to pay 20,000$ to sangakara so that he convinces all the team members to play the match”...wrote preity zinta via #imhotbutmarraigenot


And later in another press conference the reporters tried to cheer up vettori by asking him “How does it feel to be the best batsman, left-arm spin bowler, and only international caliber player in the team that you also happen to captain”. , for which vettori blushed and walked out.




5.Country :Australia


Newspapers: the racist jerks!!


Article: Aussies have appointed rajnikant as their special strategist for south Asian matches.


Sydney,26th feb: After ricky pointing wrongly threw his helmet on the t.v rather than throwing it inside the locker, the Australian cricket committee has decided to appoint rajnikant as special coach , so that he can help to throw things properly in proper places without even looking at it and that too from miles away.


Most recently rajnikant swept all the nobel awards for inventing “chitti” last year. Chitti, the Robot, has been reckoned by the committees as an “outstanding contribution” to the fields of Physics, Chemistry, Physiology, and Peace, while the script of the Tamil movie Enthiran, which is based on the life and achievements of Chitti, has been regarded as an “outstanding work in an ideal direction” in the field of Literature, thus completing a clean sweep of Nobel Prizes for Rajinikanth.


This indeed added weighted advantage to rajni before he was chosen as the special coach. Even kailagnar karunanidhi threatened to go on 1hour hunger strike if this tamil superstar was denied his right postion and place in the cricketing world.






And friends after going through so many newspapers i dint feel like reading more...because rest come ,play and go back ...So there’s no need to even blink about them!!